dramaturgy: ([Misc] Reeve.)
I haven't written in here in a long time, because there's nothing I really want to talk about.

Bee is here in town, and by here I mean in Brooklyn and going to Cap 21 in Manhattan. I've been flip flopping back and forth between being her hausfrau and being back here on Long Island in order to work my four weekly hours at Old Navy which doesn't pay for crap. I opened a line of credit so that I can ruin my credit rating forever have some help living.

It seems like all I do is worry about money and long story short, it's fucking upsetting, right.

BUT some good news: I did get offered a REAL dramaturging job. And when I say real I mean I'm going to work with playwrights from Young Playwrights on the Urban Retreat for a couple of days. Elizabeth mentioned there was an "honorarium" for dramaturgs. So whether that means I get a sandwich and a metrocard or fifty buck I don't know.

I've been looking for more ways to make money and put in applications everywhere that's accepting them. The problem is that no one is hiring seasonal anymore and there's no way I'll be able to keep three jobs and be a student come September.
dramaturgy: ([DW/T] Ten/Rose :D)
I'm sure people who follow me on multiple sites are sick of seeing this, but OMG THE JUJAMCYN THEATERS PEOPLE E-MAILED ME FOR AN INTERVIEW. I could be a theater operations intern with one of the three major producing organizations in the city. It's not artistic but I DON'T CARE. I love doing anything having to do with theatre. I am excited. Cross your fingers.

Also, OMG CASTLE. ALL MY CREYS.
dramaturgy: ([S-M] Kiss.)
My ducks are getting in a row, somewhat. I have a place to live -- and I may even actually be able to afford it -- although I have no idea on earth how I'm going to afford anything else unless one of the internships calls me and Old Navy starts scheduling me again. They didn't schedule me last week and I don't work this week either. Maybe they're trying to be courteous with the end of the year, finals and all. But I don't know. Why would you hire someone to not schedule them? I thought about opening a card and live off of that for a little bit (just important stuff, I promise) but if I don't have to I'd really rather not.

I should be reading a play and making talking points for tomorrow but guess what, I don't want to.

My play was chosen for the reading. I'm happy about that and excited to hear it out loud, particularly if we can get the actors that we want. My classmate who is actually dramaturging the play (I don't have to 'turg since my play is being worked on -- I'm doing other things to compensate workload wise) is super excited about it and that makes me excited.

I wish that the stupid "Work from Home!" things on the internet weren't all scams that want me to pay them to join the club and then are basically like it's your fault if you're not making the money you want. If there were a place that I could get paid to do freelance work at, that would be cool.

IDK. I am not really a materialistic person, I don't think, but I worry about money because I don't feel like I have any.

My grandmother is doing better. She's not in the nursing home yet, she's in the hospital in 'skilled care', something like that. I talked to her on the phone on Mother's Day and she sounded like she was in good spirits. My mom said that eventually they would be going through the house and gathering things, probably in order to sell? I don't know. That house has been my grandparents' house my whole life and most of my dad's... I don't know what to feel. Mom told me if there were things that I wanted to make a list but of course now that I'm trying to go through the house in my head I'm drawing a complete blank. It feels weird to be putting dibs on her stuff. I guess I just thought that the phrase "You can't take it with you" meant when you die, not when you go to the home.

Whatever. Have an icon of Jenn Damiano kissing Reeve Carney.
dramaturgy: ([BSG] Starbuck is unhappy.)
I have so much I want to talk about. But since brevity is the soul of wit and tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes, I will be brief.

My sister is still in Japan of this moment. She's okay, there wasn't much damage in Nagoya from the earthquake, but she's going (I keep typing 'coming' but I'm not there) home for a bit and she'll get in on Monday. I don't know if my mom will ever let her go anywhere ever again, but maybe now at least she won't drive me crazy for a bit. I love my mother and understand being worried, but seriously. (I also understand that she is ~mother and her worry probably outshines any that I had -- and I was a bit worried but my sister is a smart girl and the Japanese know how to handle it.) I told Gretchen to grab something good when the looting started, but apparently they don't do that. Which is cool.

Sunday I went and saw Angels in America at Signature again. They changed the cast, and Michael Urie was playing Prior so obviously I had to go. As much as I hesitate to say it... Michael Urie is totally my Prior. Justin Kirk is wonderful in the film, and Christian Borle was amazing, but Michael? He was inspired. He was just the perfect combination of righteous, queeny rage, fear, awareness of the absurdity of it all, and at times, utter contempt for the world around him. And how he looks in a dress is exactly as unfair as you would think it is.

Adam Driver was a newcomer as Louis. I LOVED him. He LOOKED like a neurotic Jewboy, and had amazing comic timing. At first I thought he was a little stiff but I warmed up to him. I actually ended up liking Louis a little lot more than I usually do -- which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Considering some of the things he does, it increases my sympathy and emotional reaction when he does or says reprehensible things. Truthfully, Bill Heck puts too much ANGRY~ in his Joe for my taste. I get that he's supposed to be confused and maybe a bit self-loathing, but I don't think I should fear for Harper's safety when they're arguing. I didn't like Keira Keeley (I think that's her name) as Harper as much as I liked Zoe Kazan. Zoe was a bit younger, more ethereal -- I could believe she went flying and saw ex-drag queens in her hallucinations, but Keira went a bit more zombiesque with her interpretation at times. And there was a lot of yelling. :\ Bill Porter was still Belize and he was STILL fabulous. Jeffrey Wright is Jeffrey Wright but Bill Porter was DIVAING OUT. The angel was good. I don't know if I like her as much as Robin Weigert, but it was a different interpretation. A lot more human at all times, not just sometimes.

I didn't want to stalk too much -- stagedooring Off-Broadway is a different culture than Broadway shows, I'm finding -- but I wanted to fangirl Michael Urie a little and was under orders from [livejournal.com profile] occultebelta to do so. So he signed my copy of The Temperamentals and told him I'd enjoyed that play as well, I'm teaching it in my 101 class this semester (last semester wasn't so impressed with Angels), and it was in part due to that play that I want to pursue my MFA project in queer dramaturgy. I voiced a concern about identifying straight -- in my experience, cautious self-deprecation and disclaiming works out better in the end when it's genuine -- and he blew it off. He said, "You may have more to say than a queer artist." So therefore I intend to make no more apologies about it. Onward and upward. Michael Urie said so.

Last week I applied and interviewed for a customer service position at Old Navy -- so basically what I'd been doing at Lane Bryant, but I'll be able to do it in jeans. Except when they offered me the position and tried to set up a time for me to come in for training and such, they proceeded to ignore the availability I gave them when I applied and tried to get me to come in Monday during classtimes, Tuesdays when I'm teaching, and damn. I don't even. Why? So I gave him my availability AGAIN and he said he'd call back. That was Wednesday. So if this is going to be a chronic problem I'm not sure I want to work for them. Because my school and teaching job are going to come first. Sorry. The end.

I had two major writing assignments due last Monday. Of course I left them until the last minute. One was a ten minute play, which I actually ended up being proud of despite not considering myself a playwright (it's hard to give all the information the audience needs just in dialogue without being didactic or fake). I got a B+ on a paper on Elizabethan foreign policy. I probably would have gotten higher if I'd been able to bother with MLA formatting and edit properly, but no. She did compliment my handling of the history though, so I will take it.

I've sort of started using my tumblr that I made to see what the fuss was about. And when I say 'using' I mean I'm reblogging shit like it's going out of style. It's here.

I am giving serious thought as to when I want to move, and 'soon' is what comes to mind. Twice this week I have been woken at 9:30 by a roommate (the same roommate) wailing the song "Fuck You" at the top of her voice. First of all, that's a god awful song 24/7, and second, 9:30 is not the proper hour to be shouting songs.

I just have this fear of not having enough money to stay in an apartment elsewhere and getting evicted and having to live in my car. Which is stupid. But I get anxious, I get depressed about being anxious, I get anxious because I don't get anything done when I'm depressed and it piles up, etc.

Also, Galileo is going to suck. And that is an objective assessment.
dramaturgy: ([SPN] Anna is dangerous.)
Since I don't think I'm smart enough for "The Politics of Aesthetics," let's have an LJ update instead.

Last weekend I was feeling a bit sick, and by Monday night I had a raging sinus infection. So I cancelled my class for Tuesday and went to the doctor and got some drugs. He was a nice doctor; we had a lovely conversation about Iowa because I was wearing my Coe College sweatshirt (I need a new one, this one's getting all ratty) and apparently his mother grew up in Cedar Rapids. Wednesday I was still on my back, but I woke upon Thursday and cared about things again, so I decided I could teach and go to Galileo rehearsal -- which is going really well. I'm enjoying it.

Friday was hella busy. I went into the city to run some errands; I dropped off/picked up scripts at Young Playwrights and got my brother a birthday gift. I walked around in the theatre district. I love the city so much, sometimes it actually hurts me.

Then I went with another woman in the program to see an NT Live broadcast of Donmar Warehouse's production of King Lear with Derek Jacobi. Now, I am a huge fan of Michael Grandage and the Donmar. I think they do beautiful shows that are not dependent on design or spectacle, but instead allow actors and plays to do the work for themselves and letting talent shine through. I would seriously give my right arm to work for that man.

That said, I also don't have another Lear that I've seen to compare it to -- but it was stunning. Derek Jacobi is just as marvelous as you think he would be from beginning to end. Gina McKee was an awesome stone cold bitch as Goneril. The brothers were also great, and the whole thing with them and Gloucester was so wonderful it hurt. Edmund was compact and sort of weaselly looking, and Edgar was tall, gallant -- basically everything he's supposed to be. (And he was doing some dead ringer Matt Smith and his confusing yet sexually exciting facial hair action as Tom, which was only a little distracting but it was working for me.) There was this wonderful/awful moment after Gloucester's been blinded and meets with Edgar again, still as Tom, he slips and calls him "father" when me and probably a good 70% of the audience all went, "Ohh" because it hurt so good. Ron Cook made me cry as the Fool -- he was superb. I have seen him onstage twice (I suppose technically three times?) and he is just so great every single time.

I don't know if I've ever had my heart broken quite like when Lear came on, wailing -- not so much crying as just a full out cry of despair -- with Cordelia's body.

They also advertised the next NT Live broadcast which is Johnny Lee Miller and Benedict Cumberbatch trading off lead roles of the Creature and Victor Frankenstein in "Frankenstein." They're going to do one broadcast for each and DO WANT. I want to see both.

Spider-Man is hiring a script doctor which is honestly what needed work but there is a part of me going ASSHOLES I'M A DRAMATURG THAT'S MY JOB.

Also I'm coming to that time where I have a lot of things to do and I don't want to do any of them, and some of them don't have a penalty like not doing homework does. These are things like finding a job, and finding internships to apply for.

ETA: Since I'm a big old slut for production/rehearsal photography, here's some for Lear.
dramaturgy: ([Buffy] I'll take care of your money!)
Today I was going to start job searching again, and then I had a dream where someone wasn't going to hire me because of my weight.

Now, I know nobody's stupid enough to come out and SAY that since that is an invitation for a lawsuit, but it's really depressing to have the wind taken out of your sails when you're not even out of bed yet.
dramaturgy: ([TF] Get up.)
I wonder if I can squeeze a nap in before church.

That is likely as far as that thought will go, so I'll say no more. It is Maundy Thursday and ergo almost Easter, which is my favorite church holiday. I was working today on making more of the Figaro/Figaro costumes.

I was going to talk about a bunch of stuff in here but I can't really think of anything else to say. OH I bought a ticket for the cheap seats at New York City Center's "Anyone Can Whistle." Raul Esparza and Sutton Foster, how can I refuse? I also found out that one of my Broadway hubbies Aaron Lazar is in the revival of A Little Night Music, so that's gone on the list of things to see. Not to mention that Adam Rapp has a new play called "The Metal Children" going up in May and Phoebe Strole is in it, so I want to try and make it.

[livejournal.com profile] duchessdollydot will be getting here in not so long. I have food to cook for Easter dinner and I am so excited to have company it's just kind of sad. Me, I mean.

My mother sent me my Easter basket in the mail, and it had all the normal stuff you would find. Chocolate, SWEETTARTS CHICKS DUCKS AND BUNNIES, and a couple cheap DVDs. But there was also a packet of index cards and a glue stick. I don't understand.

About six more weeks left. I can make it.
dramaturgy: ([SA] Spring + Summer)
Ugh, my glands are huge and I wish that were a euphemism for something, but it isn't. It would be nice to not be sick, especially since I used up all my sick excuses last week when I was mentally not fit for human company. I'm not much better this week and I don't know why.

But tomorrow I GET MY CAR. Val will take me to Herbee Dodge one last time, I will take care of the insurance mumbo jumbo, and I will drive away with my cute little Neon. And we will live happily ever after.

And then I have to start looking for a summer job. Damnit.
dramaturgy: ([Celebs] *fistpump!*)
Damn, what a week.

Tuesday, V took me down to the dealership in West Islip where I looked at a cute little Neon. I liked it, we haggled (well, V haggled for me, I'm just not that awesome) and I was supposed to have a test drive today, but when we got down there, he wasn't in because of the snow. I was a little bummed because there wasn't a call or anything to reschedule, so now I have to call first thing tomorrow.

Wednesday I went and saw Fuerza Bruta for class, and I hope to be able to put my thoughts about it on paper for class. It was... pure, amazing, beautiful spectacle. It was an environmental piece, so there were no seats. We moved around in the space as set pieces moved around us, there was dance, they came into the audience, we got wet, there was no plot, IT WAS AMAZING. Though the New York incarnation is not exactly like this, it's a pretty good montage of what was going on:



It was amazing. If it weren't seventy bucks a head (our class had a group deal for $35) then I would go back in a heartbeat.

Thursday I woke up and had the beginnings of a cold -- I still have it, but you know how it just hits you on that first day and you don't even want to move? Yeah. I didn't go to class and I called in to work and stayed here in the apartment. I got up this morning and figured I may as well go in whether there were classes or not because of the snow (there weren't), and so I worked a few hours to keep myself on track.
dramaturgy: ([DH] Topher is confused.)
Who skipped work today because she wanted to even though she first woke up in plenty of time to get there? Who would do such a thing?

Oh right that would be me.
dramaturgy: ([SPN] One of those days.)
Argh.

I made a To Do list in the Gassner meeting this afternoon but it may as well be called "Things I Don't Want To Do." But I know I have to. :(

And then I got a phone call from some bill collector lady that says I owe the doctor in DeWitt money that I REALLY DON'T HAVE and so I called my parents and they said they'd take care of it except they obviously didn't. In conclusion, don't trust anyone else to take care of things for you. Ever. Especially when it involves your credit rating. It's only going to end badly.

My mom bothered me for a Christmas list last night on the phone so I made one and sent it to my dad to print out. How much do you guys want to bet that that's never going to make it to her either? Yeah, I didn't think so. It's mostly stuff that I am either reasonably sure can be acquired (i.e. books by Bernard Cornwell. He is not so obscure that a mid-sized bookstore in the Quad Cities is not going to have him in stock) or things that I have little to no chance of actually getting and so am not actually expecting to see it (i.e. a BlackBerry, a book of lectures on Othello, and the complete series of Rome). Things I would like that I can't actually put on a Christmas list: more time, more time to sleep, a time machine (are you noticing a pattern?), that people would stop being assholes, a cure for being homesick.

Then I read a spoilery interview with Sera Gamble and I want it to be January now. :( But it put me in a better mood temporarily. They seriously have to have the most amazing writer's room ever.
dramaturgy: ([SPN] Gabriel.)
I am watching some episodes of Hoarders on the internet. And now all I want to do is scrub the apartment from ceiling to floor.

And now the part that is just blah. )

In other news, I have been daydreaming about working in a theatre somewhere near home that is not Chicago. Because Chitown makes me want to cry.

And I have a deficit in TA hours that I have absolutely no hope of making up by the end of the semester, so I am probably going to be in trouble with the department. I hate my life.
dramaturgy: ([SPN] Suicidal teddy bear.)
So for want of anything else to do on a Saturday night, I went to Bank of America's website (one of the two banks with ATMs on campus, and the only one off Long Island) and signed up for checking/savings accounts so I can get my New York residency. Monday I'll have to go see what I have to do to change my direct deposit account. :x

I DON'T WANT TO GROW UP AND BE AN ADULT. MAKE IT STOP.

ETA: Also, why does the universe hate me? Why is there a SPN con in Chitown right after I leave the Midwest? This can't be a coincidence. Because I could have been in the same room at that right there.

I'm sorry. You know what a man in a vest and tie does to me.

I'd kind of like to go to one. Because now that 5x09's aired I can only imagine the meta meta that will be going on will be FANTASTIC.
dramaturgy: ([QAF] Emmett.)
Awesome things today:

I got a three piece luggage set at goodwill for ten bucks. For another two bucks I got Jacob Have I Loved in paperback and Fugitive Days by Bill Ayers in hardback.
I AM getting money for SUNY. I haven't done the math on how much it is going to be after tuition and everything, but I think I'll be okay.
Related: see today's XKCD. That is me.
Today all I did was freight. I didn't have to steal with stupid customers.
dramaturgy: ([SPN] Betrayal.)
A few mere months ago I thought Twitter was stupid and it kind of is but I can be a stupid person. So here is what I've been up to, according to my Twitter updates.

SUNY is still driving me nuts. I e-mailed the graduate school today, although. Augh. I am trying not to get my knickers in a twist over it but my knickers are pretty twisty to begin with.

Tuesday when I was driving to work some idiot teenagers (seriously these guys had a couple years in high school left) were trying to play games with me. I was going 70 or so (running late >_>) and they were going 65, so whatever. I was getting ready to pass, and then they sped up. I sped up because I wasn't really thinking about it, and they sped up. So I could see they were going to be douchebags (i.e. I actually looked at them through my windows and they were both grinning at me like the shit eating dirtbags they are) and did what any mature adult would do. I slammed on my brakes, got behind them, and tailgated when they continued to play Speed Up, Slow Down with me. So in conclusion, yes, I am amazing and mature. But they started it.

And then I get to work and we get our new marketing stuff, my boss and I find that the new marketing not only makes more work for us and it is stupid. I am only glad my last day is soon so I don't actually have to learn any of that crap.

Yesterday I watched the first couple episodes of The Bedford Diaries, a short lived show on WB that wasn't picked back up when they became the CW. There are only eight episodes and I love to watch Milo Ventimiglia... well, doing anything. I am only a red-blooded female. Although seeing him in a pink polo shirt killed me a little.

And now today I have to go to work. Again.
dramaturgy: ([Heroes] Sandra + Mr Muggles.)
My stomach hurts and I wish I could say I didn't know why, but I'm pretty sure I know why.

I saw HBP with the family last Friday and it was pretty good. I like David Yates as a director, I think he knows how to take the important bits and be faithful to the piece as a whole, which I like. I think someone finally told Emma to stop acting with her eyebrows because they didn't distract me as much as they have previously, I will have to see when I take [livejournal.com profile] roseanna in August. Jim Broadbent was excellent but I knew he was going to be, and Dan and Rupert were both great, and I have to say that Tom Felton blew me away. Also he looks good in a suit and I feel really dirty for saying that but SUE ME.

My last day at the store is August 1. And that makes me nervous.
dramaturgy: ([TTB] Six AM.)
So I did the math and it's 42 days until I'm expected at SUNY. Six weeks. And I have no information.

Work is crap.

What I love about Weeds is that nobody has their lives together. Nobody. I don't feel so bad about my life in comparison.

I should be working on my summergenfest fic for SPN but despite being in my manic phase (I'm a Libra, I get to have those without the excuse of a mental illness) I don't want to.
dramaturgy: ([Glee] Don't Stop Believing.)
I haven't written in here (aside from the fic) since after Kitty left, so I probably should.

I'm not doing much these days, just working and waiting for July 5th to roll around so I can run back up to Milwaukee for the final night of Summerfest and ELVIS COSTELLO. But Liz, you never said you were an Elvis Costello fan. Well truth be told I probably wouldn't be considered a fan by most standards, but I know enough to know that he doesn't belong on the 'classic rock' stage and like I'm going to miss a chance to see a living legend on stage. That and I have to miss FLOGGING MOLLY because I have to work on the afternoon of the fourth. WHY IS THE MALL OPEN ON JULY THE FRIGGING FOURTH ANYWAY? I don't know.

I applied for a forbearance on my Stafford Loan because I figured the worse they could do is tell me no, and now I can actually afford to buy stuff that I'm going to need for school in the fall and put a little bit more away in the bank.

Like paying for my speeding ticket. Yes, I was driving home last Friday from taking Kitty back to Milwaukee when the Belmont PD reached out to embrace me. I cried, but only when I heard a sucking sound that was all of my money leaving my account. I deserved the ticket though, so at least this time I was able to wait until we were finished until I started crying. And he was nice at least. But the real delicious irony is that "All That Jazz" was playing on my iPod when I got pulled over. Yep. This would be funny if it weren't me, and right now it's just kind of sad.

I've been using my lethargic mood over the last few days to catch up on TV. First I watched Tudors, then the Gossip Girl finale, and the Glee pilot (OH MY JESUS PLEASE LET THIS SHOW CATCH ON), and I also caught up on House. I'd missed like ten episodes of that, which was more than I thought I had. And now I'm watching Dollhouse. I think Fringe is next, because. Mad scientists, hello.

OH YES and while Kitty was here we watched seasons one, two, and most of three of Supernatural with my sister. It was great because we got to see her flaily reactions as she watched things for the first time, and we got to look back and seriously it's kind of creepy how much of those seasons is really set up for APOCALYPSE TIEM NAO. Or, if not set up, it just kind of fits in perfectly with everything. Also we became doomed, but that is another story for another time.
dramaturgy: ([Celebs] Misha makes kittens!)
I woke up this morning and went to the kitchen and there was a YELLOW JACKET hanging out in there all "'sup?" and I went "AL;SKDJF;SD YOU CAN'T BE IN HERE *CHASES OUT THE BACK DOOR*"

I swear, folks. This was like The Unicorn and the Wasp huge.

I really hope that's not setting the tone for today, especially since I have to work.

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