The Icon Faerie

I should be finishing my thesis.

but I’m not.

I’m on page twenty-five of about forty and I just. My brain. pffffffffffft

I mean I’m not actually going to finish my degree this semester because I haven’t had a professional internship.

so I’m kind of like what’s the point.

Since I don't think I'm smart enough for "The Politics of Aesthetics," let's have an LJ update instead.

Last weekend I was feeling a bit sick, and by Monday night I had a raging sinus infection. So I cancelled my class for Tuesday and went to the doctor and got some drugs. He was a nice doctor; we had a lovely conversation about Iowa because I was wearing my Coe College sweatshirt (I need a new one, this one's getting all ratty) and apparently his mother grew up in Cedar Rapids. Wednesday I was still on my back, but I woke upon Thursday and cared about things again, so I decided I could teach and go to Galileo rehearsal -- which is going really well. I'm enjoying it.

Friday was hella busy. I went into the city to run some errands; I dropped off/picked up scripts at Young Playwrights and got my brother a birthday gift. I walked around in the theatre district. I love the city so much, sometimes it actually hurts me.

Then I went with another woman in the program to see an NT Live broadcast of Donmar Warehouse's production of King Lear with Derek Jacobi. Now, I am a huge fan of Michael Grandage and the Donmar. I think they do beautiful shows that are not dependent on design or spectacle, but instead allow actors and plays to do the work for themselves and letting talent shine through. I would seriously give my right arm to work for that man.

That said, I also don't have another Lear that I've seen to compare it to -- but it was stunning. Derek Jacobi is just as marvelous as you think he would be from beginning to end. Gina McKee was an awesome stone cold bitch as Goneril. The brothers were also great, and the whole thing with them and Gloucester was so wonderful it hurt. Edmund was compact and sort of weaselly looking, and Edgar was tall, gallant -- basically everything he's supposed to be. (And he was doing some dead ringer Matt Smith and his confusing yet sexually exciting facial hair action as Tom, which was only a little distracting but it was working for me.) There was this wonderful/awful moment after Gloucester's been blinded and meets with Edgar again, still as Tom, he slips and calls him "father" when me and probably a good 70% of the audience all went, "Ohh" because it hurt so good. Ron Cook made me cry as the Fool -- he was superb. I have seen him onstage twice (I suppose technically three times?) and he is just so great every single time.

I don't know if I've ever had my heart broken quite like when Lear came on, wailing -- not so much crying as just a full out cry of despair -- with Cordelia's body.

They also advertised the next NT Live broadcast which is Johnny Lee Miller and Benedict Cumberbatch trading off lead roles of the Creature and Victor Frankenstein in "Frankenstein." They're going to do one broadcast for each and DO WANT. I want to see both.

Spider-Man is hiring a script doctor which is honestly what needed work but there is a part of me going ASSHOLES I'M A DRAMATURG THAT'S MY JOB.

Also I'm coming to that time where I have a lot of things to do and I don't want to do any of them, and some of them don't have a penalty like not doing homework does. These are things like finding a job, and finding internships to apply for.

ETA: Since I'm a big old slut for production/rehearsal photography, here's some for Lear.

Nothing today.

Grrrr.

I AM NEVER GOING TO GET INTO GRAD SCHOOL.
</dramatics>

Brooklyn College just called me to say that they had my stuff, BUT the papers I wrote had to go to the department in question, which I never EVER saw on their website, and also that they never received my official transcripts from Coe OR my letters of recommendation.

There's two I'm not getting into. Three to go.

I hate pretending to be a responsible adult. I'm so desperately bad at it.

Happy Mother's Day to the mothers and mothers of those on my flist. ::hugs::

And now for ramblings of the day.

I don't want to have a graduation party.

I don't want to have it at the church, I don't want to have it at home or at my grandma's house -- I don't want to have one. As in, at all. I don't really know why. I mean, in my head I know it makes sense, to have a place where people can congratulate me on graduating high school and give me money my accomplishments... but I don't really feel like it's that big of an accomplishment. I don't feel like it's an end to be celebrated, just a stepping stone. I have so much more that I want to accomplish that it seems silly to celebrate now, sort of like putting the cart before the horse.

I know that must sound overly patrician and snotty, but it's how I feel. I don't have a degree yet, I have a diploma. I haven't gotten into film school or BADA or AMDA. I don't have a Golden Globe, SAG Award, or Oscar on my dresser.

...and I really don't want to be in a large group of people who are related to me. I don't do well in those sorts of groups.