(no subject)

[dramaturgy]

To: Central High School at large
From: Liz Sager, The Kid That Sits In Front Because She Actually Wants To Learn

stupid
moronic
idiotic
imbecilic
weariness
credulity
dullness
misjudge
foolish
insensible
sluggish
senseless
doltish
twitty
sottish
clodpated
few fries short of a Happy Meal
mind like a camera with the lense cap on
few bricks short of a wall
not the brightest crayon in the box
not the sharpest knife in the drawer
not the spiciest pepperoni on the pizza
ditzy
a few clowns short of a circus.
an experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
a few beers short of a six-pack.
dumber than a box of hair.
a few peas short of a casserole.
doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box.
the wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
one Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
one taco short of a combination plate.
a few feathers short of a whole duck.
all foam, no beer.
the cheese slid off his cracker.
body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt.
warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
he fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
an intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
as smart as bait.
chimney's clogged.
doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
doesn't know much but leads the league in nostril hair.
elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
forgot to pay his brain bill.
her sewing machine's out of thread.
his antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
his belt doesn't go through all the loops.
if he had another brain, it would be lonely.
missing a few buttons on his remote control.
no grain in the silo.
proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
receiver is off the hook.
several nuts short of a full pouch.
skylight leaks a little.
slinky's kinked.
surfing in Nebraska.
too much yardage between the goal posts.
a few sandwiches short of a picnic.
dumb
inane
vexatious
exasperating
unwise
dense
slow
thick-headed
fatuous
vacuous
puerile
crass
dim-witted
ignorant
stayed in the shallow end of the gene pool
airheaded
nonsensical
half-assed (arsed)
unintelligent
senseless
absurd
asinine
dim
bright as a burned out lightbulb
smart as paint
silly
the missing village idiot
all synapse, no neuron
cretinish
hebetudinous
clueless
addle-pated
brainless
dunderheaded
he lives way out there where the buses don't run
inept
lack-witted
stolid
thick

Look. I just gave you 100 words that mean stupid, and none of them were "gay" or "retarded". Go me.

Wanting to ram a pole up your arse,
Me

Comments

[lavender-ice.livejournal.com]

Amen, sister. If I never hear the word "faggot" as an insult again, it'll be too soon.

Of course, I'm quite aware this will never happen. But a girl can dream, right?

Re:

[dramaturgy.livejournal.com]

She can.

[polymnia.livejournal.com]

*claps*

[zeft.livejournal.com]

That's some list.

*takes notes for future insults*

Re:

[dramaturgy.livejournal.com]

yep. Came up with them all by myself, too.

...

Then again, am super-human life form with above average intelligence.

[nimuial.livejournal.com]

Yay! Good work... *also stealing some for future reference*

It's always a good idea to expand one's vocabulary. Mwahaha.

We call these people at our school "fluffs," as in "he/she has fluff for brains."

I esp. liked "doesn't know much but leads the league in nostril hair." *snickers*

~Mel~

Re:

[dramaturgy.livejournal.com]

Ha. My favorite one was "couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel".