dramaturgy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dramaturgy) wrote2004-11-04 01:58 pm
dramaturgy) wrote2004-11-04 01:58 pm
(no subject)
Just when I think my college newspaper is completely worthless, it gives me a few good laughs via thte Humor/Blatant Lies section.
DWR seeking foreign man known to dwell in caves and who enjoys to make home videos. Also, any knkowledge of allussive weapons of mass destruction (I know there out there!) appreciated. I am a very goodlooking, smart and powerful man--and I ain't never lied!
LFD seeks mortician make-up artist capable of producing a life-like appearance. I'm also willing to ocnsider anyone who owns a substantial amount of stock in French's mustard company. Strong preference shown to those who live in a "blue state."
BVP seeks hit man to bump off Dubya. Willingness to also "take care" of patients farther up on the heart donor list a plus. Minimal charge appreciated--political paychecks don't allow for extravagance.
KEY:
DWR -- Dumb White Republican
LFD -- Long-Faced Democrat
BVP -- Bitter Vice President
Here are some albums that I own and some commentary on how their titles mirror my state of mind. Thank you for reading. But don't feel obligated.
Our Lady Peace -- Happiness is Not a Fish You Can Catch
[Or: Happiness is not a fish I can catch.]
Starsailor -- Love is Here
[For someone else.]
The Anniversary -- Designing a Nervous Breakdown
[So far it's coming along all right.]
Wilco -- Being There
[It was almost like not being there, insofar as no one noticed. Or maybe I wasn't there -- not much difference, really.]
Jason Mraz -- Waiting For My Rocket To Come
[It's taking its damn time.]
Ryan Adams -- Heartbreaker
[Heartbroken. Repeatedly.]
Interpol -- Turn on the Bright Lights
[Maybe if you shine them on me I'll do something entertaining, eh? You suppose?]
Guster -- Keep It Together
[It's... too... difficult... Can't...]
Moby -- Everything Is Wrong
[I concur.]
The Postal Service -- Give Up
[Sounds like a plan.]
I didn't write any of these, I'm just sharing because we all need entertainment.
DWR seeking foreign man known to dwell in caves and who enjoys to make home videos. Also, any knkowledge of allussive weapons of mass destruction (I know there out there!) appreciated. I am a very goodlooking, smart and powerful man--and I ain't never lied!
LFD seeks mortician make-up artist capable of producing a life-like appearance. I'm also willing to ocnsider anyone who owns a substantial amount of stock in French's mustard company. Strong preference shown to those who live in a "blue state."
BVP seeks hit man to bump off Dubya. Willingness to also "take care" of patients farther up on the heart donor list a plus. Minimal charge appreciated--political paychecks don't allow for extravagance.
KEY:
DWR -- Dumb White Republican
LFD -- Long-Faced Democrat
BVP -- Bitter Vice President
Here are some albums that I own and some commentary on how their titles mirror my state of mind. Thank you for reading. But don't feel obligated.
Our Lady Peace -- Happiness is Not a Fish You Can Catch
[Or: Happiness is not a fish I can catch.]
Starsailor -- Love is Here
[For someone else.]
The Anniversary -- Designing a Nervous Breakdown
[So far it's coming along all right.]
Wilco -- Being There
[It was almost like not being there, insofar as no one noticed. Or maybe I wasn't there -- not much difference, really.]
Jason Mraz -- Waiting For My Rocket To Come
[It's taking its damn time.]
Ryan Adams -- Heartbreaker
[Heartbroken. Repeatedly.]
Interpol -- Turn on the Bright Lights
[Maybe if you shine them on me I'll do something entertaining, eh? You suppose?]
Guster -- Keep It Together
[It's... too... difficult... Can't...]
Moby -- Everything Is Wrong
[I concur.]
The Postal Service -- Give Up
[Sounds like a plan.]
I didn't write any of these, I'm just sharing because we all need entertainment.